{"product_id":"plushie-dreadfuls-emotional-support-shrimp-keychain","title":"Emotional Support Shrimp Keychain","description":"\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e✨EMOTIONAL SUPPORT SHRIMP KEYCHAIN✨\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA Shramp a Day Keeps the Breakdown Away\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOh hai. Is me. Shramp. Small. Fuzzy. Full of disproportionately large emotional insight for creature shaped like a pink comma.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHate life? SHRAMP IT.\u003cbr\u003eExistential dread? SHRAMP IT.\u003cbr\u003eUnreplied texts, unfulfilled dreams, and a suspicious mole? \u003cstrong\u003eSHRAMP. IT.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am your pocket-sized crustacean therapist with a heart the size of a meatball. But plush. And pink. And probably better at listening than your last three exes combined.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eClip me to your keys, your bag, your last shred of hope. Feel the dark ennui of a morning commute dissolve as I softly whisper in your soul-voice, “We can do this. I believe in you. Also... we should get snacks.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💼 Boring meeting? \u003cstrong\u003eSHRAMP \u003c\/strong\u003eIT. I'll make strategic eye contact with your trauma.\u003cbr\u003e🛻 Stuck in traffic again? \u003cstrong\u003eSHRAMP \u003c\/strong\u003eIT. I navigate emotional congestion better than Google Maps.\u003cbr\u003e💔 Staring into the abyss of unmet childhood needs? Babe. Shramp. It. I came pre-programmed with generational empathy and a tiny embroidered bow.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI am not just a keychain. I am a symbol. A talisman. A tiny stitched scream into the void that also happens to match your aesthetic.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBuy me. Hold me. Let me sit with your pain. Together, we are unstoppable.\u003cbr\u003eTogether, we are... \u003cstrong\u003eSHRAMP\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSmall. Soft. Severe emotional support.\u003cbr\u003e100% polyester*. 0% judgment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0306\/6745\/files\/banner_01_large.png?v=1516982636\" alt=\"\" style=\"display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIncludes:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e1x  3.15\" Keychain \u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #ef0f0f;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0306\/6745\/files\/banner_01_large.png?v=1516982636\" alt=\"\" style=\"display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e*Materials for comedic effect only. Actual materials may differ. Does not (intentionally) contain any actual shrimp. May contain shrimp. Or shramp. Do not eat.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"color: #ef0f0f;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg style=\"display: block; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\" alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0306\/6745\/files\/heart-banner-top_large.png?v=1516982636\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cem\u003ePlushie Dreadfuls Emotional Support Shrimp is Copyright of Mysterious LLC and is exclusively available at plushiedreadfuls.com\u003cbr\u003ePlushie Dreadfuls is a trademark of Mysterious LLC\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBeware of imitations and copycats\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"mysite","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50156865716501,"sku":"ACSHRMPFB","price":11.24,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0877\/8655\/3621\/files\/emotional-support-shrimp-keychain-378.jpg?v=1788779575","url":"https:\/\/mythicplush.store\/products\/plushie-dreadfuls-emotional-support-shrimp-keychain","provider":"Circus Toys 🎪🧸","version":"1.0","type":"link"}